If you’re parenting a child with a PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance) profile, you’ve probably seen just how rich, vivid, and complex their inner worlds can be. Many parents tell me their child seems to live half in reality, half in imagination — with imaginary friends who are deeply “real” to them, and a fascination with villains that can leave adults scratching their heads.
But here’s the beautiful truth: this isn’t something to be worried about. It’s a window into how your PDA child experiences the world — one that can tell you so much about their inner landscape, their emotional processing, and even their way of keeping a sense of control in a world that often feels unpredictable.
🧠 PDA and the Power of Imagination
Children with a PDA profile are often incredibly imaginative and creative. Their brains are wired for flexible thinking and deep story creation — sometimes so deeply that imaginary worlds feel safer or more appealing than the real one.
Imagination gives them freedom from demands. In their inner world, they decide the rules. They can rewrite the story when things feel too hard or when real-world expectations pile up.
Their imaginary friends or fantasy characters aren’t just “pretend play” — they’re emotional companions, co-regulators, or even parts of themselves expressed safely through story. It’s a form of self-protection and self-understanding that helps them make sense of their emotions and experiences.
🦹♀️ Why PDA Kids Are Drawn to Villains
It might be surprising at first to see your child cheering for the villain. But when we look through a PDA lens, it makes perfect sense.
Villains often represent freedom, defiance, and autonomy — all things that resonate deeply for a PDA child who feels their own autonomy is constantly under threat.
They see the villain standing up to unfair rules, outsmarting the system, or refusing to conform — and that speaks to something in them.
Where most people see “bad guys,” your child might see someone misunderstood, someone who won’t be controlled. And for a PDA profile, that’s powerfully relatable.
❤️ What It Really Means
When your child loves the villains or builds whole worlds around imaginary characters, it’s not a sign they’re heading down a dark path — it’s a sign they’re exploring power, justice, and identity in their own way.
In fact, these stories often show incredible empathy. Many PDA children want to “redeem” or “save” the villains. They’ll tell you, “They’re not bad — they were just hurt.” That insight is emotional intelligence, showing how your child intuitively understands that behaviour is communication.
💬 How You Can Support It
Here are a few gentle ways to nurture this imaginative side while helping your child feel understood:
- Join their world. Ask about their imaginary friends or favourite villains — “What do they like doing?” or “Why do you think they act like that?”
You’ll often get rich answers that reveal what your child is processing emotionally. - Don’t rush to correct. If they’re identifying with the villain, avoid saying “That’s bad” or “You shouldn’t like them.” Instead, explore why they feel drawn to them.
- Use imagination as a bridge. You can use stories, roleplay, or drawing together as ways to talk about emotions, relationships, and boundaries — without it feeling like a “demand.”
- See it as communication. When your child’s imaginary world grows bigger, it might mean they’re feeling a bit overwhelmed in real life. It’s not a problem — it’s information.
🌈 The Magic in the Middle
PDA children live in a world that often misunderstands them — but in their stories, they are the creators, the protectors, the rule-breakers, and sometimes the villains too.
Their imagination isn’t a distraction from reality; it’s how they survive and thrive in it.
So next time your child introduces you to their imaginary dragon friend or insists the villain is the real hero, pause and look a little deeper.
They’re not being contrary — they’re showing you their truth in the most creative way possible.
P.S. - My imaginary dragon friends were godzuki and Pete. I was the PDA child ❤️
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